That is the funniest shit I've read in a long time!! I really needed that! Thank youI Hate to do this.....fuck it no I don't! Launched at about 5:15am "that guy" immediately starts drinking the Bloody Mary he made in a water bottle before we left his house (smelled like mostly vodka to me but whatever) . Got bait and started towards the harbor mouth out comes a beer for "that guy".
The plan was to head straight west troll around the ten mile mark and look for signs. We had agreed the night before we would stay in general area and look for the right signs. Not to be.....
"That guys" drunkenness from the night before has already set firmly back in as we are following a SW compass heading in the fog and another beer pops open...."fish are deep south" he says when I ask why we are going the wrong direction. "How do you know?" I ask. "Trust me, my instinct never fails"......"you're boat" says I knowing fish have been all up and down the coast.
After motoring along for a couple more beers and some shit talking on the radio "that guy" comes to a stop and decides it's time to start the troll. Right on! Here's where it all goes to shit (literally) and gets funny has hell!
"That guy" deploys the outriggers, sets a rod with a ceadar plug dangling from the line in the port side rod holder, goes to reach out for the line and as I'm watching loses his balance and goes, flailing reaching for something to grab onto, head over heals into the water!!! He immediately grabs the side of the boat with a look of surprise and shock on his face.
"You ok?" I ask. "Yes but I think I pooped." He says....... I start busting a gut with uncontrollable laughter but manage to get out a "what did you say?". He responds "yep.......I'm pretty sure I pooped....oh God I gotta poop right now!!". Before I could respond poop is floating up all around "that guy"......the sight of him wallowing in his own shit was all I could take.......I let loose with my own expelling of stomache contents in the form of two short but solid bursts of projectile vomit. But, again start cracking up as he looks around himself and says "oh no! I gotta get away from all this" and starts working hand over hand down the tunnel away from his shit and my puke
He pulls himself back aboard and drinks another beer as we drift in the lonley stillness of the morning fog....neither one of us speaking....silence only being broken by my uncontrolled laughter as I replayed what just happened over and over in my mind.
We finally get back on the move and trolling...
After about ten minutes I realize we are heading east. I verify with a compass check. Ok I figure we are gonna box around and keep an eye out. We keep heading east....
After twenty minutes I ask "that guy" his intentions.....no response. Ask again.....no response. Ten more minutes go by....
Anyway......we end up in front of Ponto Beach. From then on I knew there was no hope and I was just gonna go along for the ride with "that guy"
The rest of the day he drank beer, talked shit on the radio, swam and occasionally attempted to fish as we zig-zagged leisurely back to Oceanside.
I managed two decent sand bass (released).
"That guy" is one of my best friends in the world and this is a first for me seeing him act like this.
Sorry for the long story and not much of a report but figured some might get a good laugh out of it.
Moral of the story? Don't be that guy!!
View attachment 616384
View attachment 616378